Mr. Mittens Shitty search engine Bing has gained a lot of momentum recently when it was discovered Bing can bypass those unskippable ads that Youtube slapped on nearly every video in the past week.
Microsoft is ecstatic their search engine has suddenly become relevant. They’ve received encouraging messages from users that Bing “still kinda sucks” and “makes me want to rake out my eyes with a dirty fork” which is a vast improvement over previous feedback.
While Microsoft is working hard to keep the swell of new users coming back to Bing it also vowed to not neglect its long time user base: grandparents who use it as a calculator and Orange County housewives who ask it what time it is. In an email to users Friday, Microsoft assured them that Bing will continue to provide the irritating and lackluster performance they’ve come to expect over the years.
