Mr. Mittens Los Angeles, CA. Sources confirm relations are breaking down between Nancy and her direct supervisor. After changing his name to “nobody loves me” in her phone Nancy recently spent 15 minutes searching Google Images for a mountain of dog feces to serve as his contact image. Failing to find a mound big enough, she spent $5.50 on a cab and over an hour at a local dog park judging several turds before selecting a winner.
“Honestly,” she said, “it’s been the best investment in my quality of life all month.” She went on to relate, “it’s not just that I value him about the same as a pile of poop, his cologne smells like a roasted butthole. Poo seemed the most appropriate photo.”
